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The PartyI first met Chris at the tail end of junior year. I had crashed an open house party and was feeling pretty cool as I choked down a quarter of a beer out of one of those infamous red cups. Unfortunately, as the night wore on, I got a little full of myself and started hitting on the wrong girls. I thought things were going pretty well until their boyfriends showed up and decided that I needed to be put in my place.
I tried to keep my cool and acted like it was no big deal as they pushed me out to the front yard. I had never been in a fight before and wasn't sure if I wanted my first one to be with a couple of lacrosse jocks. That's when I met
ChrisSo this seal walks into a club
Thats Chriss idea of a pickup line. He isnt actually trying to close with it, however. Its just the beginning of his master plan. The formula works like this: Open with a shocking or otherwise off-colour statement or joke, discuss what youve just blown her away with, and finally, after five short minutes of discussion, kiss the girl. Chris calls it the Apocalypse Opener.
Ive never been forward enough to try it. Ive never been forward enough to try any of the things that Chris does. Of course, it never fails and before the night is through, Chris will be taking
How so, complicated?
Like, dont-accidentally-kill-yourself-and-create-a-time-paradox complicated.
Yes, lets not do that. What are you here for, anyway?
If I knew that, Id be accomplishing my task right now.
What do you know, then?
Well, one minute Im walking down the sidewalk back home and then I dunno. I ran into you.
That doesnt make any sense.
Im telling me You know, the weird thing is, I dont remember any of this.
Sometimes I write. Sometimes, I write well. This is not one of those instances. Today is a day in which I write when I cannot write. Today I have nothing. Just the frustration. I failed that math test on Monday. I know I did. I didn't have my school bag until third period today. I wanted to do the reading for Philosophy class. I wanted to get an A on the reading quiz. But I didn't. I turned in a bland test. I tried to draw; to express how I felt. In my mind I saw an image so clearly that I had only to draw it. But I can't draw. I make my hand trace the images in my mind onto paper. Or a computer screen. I can only make hashy sketch lines that come out
"I'm Leaving."I'm leaving, I said.
I got up, gathered my things, and walked toward the window. The teacher turned to give a perplexed look and asked, Where are you going?
Yes, I heard you the first time but you can't leave.
I opened the window and lowered my bag as far as I could reach before dropping it from almost the top of the first story window. It landed with a thud.
Good thing I bunched up the hoodie at the bottom of my bag, I mused.
I swung my legs through the window and sat on the sill for a moment. One of my classmates asked, How are you go
Enter ArchebaldDo you have all your stuff? asked Archebald.
Yep, replied Cooper happily.
So, remind me again why youre flying to Alabama.
Because they told me to, silly.
They? Whos they? Archebalded inquired.
Archie You KNOW you arent suppose ask about them.
What?!? Since when?
Since Chu-Chu started speaking.
Who the heck is Chu-Chu?!? You arent making any sense!
Archie, calm down. Lots of things dont make sense and yet you just accept them. For instance, how do you know me? Have yo
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`anmari has been spreading her infectious positivity throughout our community for over 6 years. Throughout this time Ana has been at the core of all things devious, passionately developing an eclectic gallery, helping organise devmeets, participating in chat events and also recently completed dedicating her time as a Community Volunteer. We are absolutely delighted to bestow the Deviousness Award for May 2013 to `anmari, congratulations! Read More